Back To Work

As you will be aware, if you have read my earlier posts, I have recently had three months off work.  This week I went back to work with a little bit of a heavy heart.  I had enjoyed my three months of freedom and having time for myself which I do not normally have.  Having gone back to work however I am absolutely loving it. It is challenging, fun and interesting. Meeting new people, facing new issues and stimulating my mind has all made me feel extremely good about myself.  I love the fact that I have a great job.  I feel I contribute to the world and I am not dependent on anybody else to support me financially.  It feels good!

Mother's Day

Ok, so here's the thing, when it comes to Mothers, it is fair to say that mine is not the best.  She has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember and alcohol has always been her number one priority.  I have come to terms with the fact that, after many years of trying, I cannot change that as she has no desire to want to.

Aside from this fact she makes no effort with me.  The last time she visited me was 10 years ago when I first moved into my house, if I want to see her then I have to visit her. If I don't visit her often enough she bitches about me to other family members. If I confront her about this then she just denies it and is always nice to my face. When I got married, she did not come to my wedding as it was abroad and said she would not fly. Only a year later however she got married abroad and I was not even invited (nobody was).  I could go on (and on) but that really is deviating from the point. 

So, Mother's Day is fast approaching. I always have the dilemma of what to do, I never feel the cards which say how wonderful Mothers are would be appropriate so I always try to get her one which is very bland and simply says "Happy Mother's Day". I do always wonder however whether her being my Mother should be celebrated at all or whether, irrespective of her failings, I should make more effort for her on Mother's day because when all is said and done she is my Mother?

Spring

Don't you just love spring?  A little bit of sunshine at this time of year really gives me the feeling that winter is almost over and spring is heading our way. Evenings start to feel a little bit longer when it is still light after I get home from work and the whole thing just makes me feel a little happier. 

I know it is all psychological but I really do feel that the weather/seasons change your mood.